Am I fat? It’s extremely painful to look at yourself in the mirror and to not be satisfied with the way you look. That’s how I’ve been feeling lately – simply disgusted with how my body looks and feels. Now, it’s not that I am an insecure person as a result of this, and it’s not like I’m totally negative about myself as a result of how my body looks.
Of course, I don’t equate my self-worth and my whole value and personality just on the way my body looks at the moment, and I certainly don’t judge others if they too are overweight or have other physical issues to deal with. It’s just that I want and feel that I deserve to feel the best that I can be. I want to reach my body’s genetic potential, and I want to have tonnes of energy to get the most out of every day and to give my all in life. But when I have a body that is literally weighing me down, then I feel disturbed and motivated to do something about it.
If you feel this way, then I know how you feel. I’ve been feeling it myself lately, especially with the onslaught of signs and symptoms that I am now currently beyond overweight, and settling into the obesity stage.
8 Effects of Being Overweight & Obese
I didn’t need to look at a weighing scale or look up what is obesity is to figure out that I no longer had an average-sized physique. There were a number of tell-tale signs that demonstrated the effects of being overweight and obese – that I had simply let myself go.
Here are just 8 of them that personally affected me. Certainly there are much more, but these ones stood out for me because I actually lived them recently, and boy did it feel embarrassing, uncomfortable, and awkward.
1) You have to keep buying new pairs of pants because you keep tearing holes in the groin area since it keeps ripping.
2) You’re old shorts and pants don’t fit anymore. The zippers and buttons won’t close at the waist.
3) You frequently get friends and family who haven’t seen you in awhile comment that you’ve gained weight.
4) You’re surprised at the weighing scales because you haven’t been monitoring them in such a long time, and you realize that you’ve gained so much weight.
5) You need to borrow other people’s clothes because your clothes don’t fit you anymore (I had to borrow my dad’s old, daggy suit and pants for a wedding because my suit just didn’t fit. any more)
6) You try to suck in your gut and your double chin for photos.
7) You prefer to wear black tops or baggy t-shirts because you feel you don’t look as fat in them.
8) You cancel plans for going to the beach because you’re too embarrassed to show your gut in public.
I’ve personally dealt with all of the above problems as a result of being obese and too fat, and it did not feel great. Often I would feel shocked that my body had become so fat and I had let myself go so much that I couldn’t even do things that I always enjoyed. It hindered my quality of life.
Also, I often felt very embarrassed that I couldn’t fit into basic clothes, and so very basic things such as going to the beach simply because I wasn’t confident enough to show off my fat body in public. Overall, I have been feeling very disappointed with myself and my body.
The Muffin-Top Incident: Accepting the Current Reality That I Am Fat
Probably the biggest moment that pushed me over the edge of actually recognizing my obesity and overweight problem was the “muffin-top incident.”
I recently moved into an apartment where there is a large multi-angled bathroom mirror. The previous place that I stayed at did not have such a large mirror, so I rarely saw myself and my body in particular. But nowadays, I now have the luxury to look at my body, especially after getting out of the shower. The other day I was looking at the mirror and looked at my gut. Due to the multi-angled mirror, I can see a reflection of my front as well as both of my sides.
That day, I couldn’t believe what I saw. From the mirror angles on the left and right, I could see my bulging stomach hanging over my hips. I saw the long line where my skin folded above itself, and I it hit me. I have a muffin-top! A disgusting, fat muffin-top!
I was shocked not only by the sight of it, but also the realization that I had a fairly big one – and the reflection of it in the mirror stared back at me. I couldn’t escape it. Every time I look in the mirror, there it is – a full-fledged muffin-top!
Recognizing My Own Obesity Problem
After seeing this, and acknowledging what I had done to my body, I talked it over with my wife, and initially laughed at myself for having a muffin-top! After the laughter, which I think was more of a way to deal with the humiliation and the pain, I then just felt angry at myself and disappointed that I had let it come to this point.
I began taking full responsibility that I could only really blame myself for letting it come to this. Am I fat? Well, yes- very much so. I began asking myself how I let it get this far, and let myself become obese. My next post goes into the story and reflection of how I had become so big and obese, and how I let it happen.